I have struggled with Predestination/Election vs. Free Will my entire life. I agree with those people who wonder how a God who loves us could create someone He knows will go to Hell and be apart from Him for all eternity. However, the more I study Scripture, the more I see the Truth. Mainly from Romans 8 and 9. I memorized Romans 8 back in April, and Romans 8:29-30 says, "For those whom He foreknew He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, in order that He might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those whom He predestined He also called, and those whom He called He also justified, and those whom He justified He also glorified." Paul goes on to say in Romans 8:33 "Who shall bring any charge against God's elect? It is God who justifies." Malachi 1:2-3 says that God loved Jacob but hated Esau. God hates? What? God is love right? It's not fair to Esau! God is evil. He is a tyrant. Given this, we feel justified in our unbelief. Well let me take you back to the beginning of the story.
Before Man was created, God created the angels to worship Him. And worship Him they did. They sang His praises, and couldn't even stand in His presence. The greatest angel, Lucifer, thought he deserved as much praise as God. After all, he was the #1 angel so why shouldn't the other angels show some love? Lucifer felt justified, so God banished him from His presence forever. Poor Lucifer, right? He got a bad rap. Other angels felt the same way, and they were banished too. They forgot one thing: HE IS GOD! How can the creation be anywhere near the Creator? God then created Man (the timeline is fuzzy as to whether Lucifer rebelled before Man was created, but Lucifer was banished to Earth, so I guess it was concurrent. I'd like to think Lucifer was jealous that God loved Man more than the angels.) God created Man in Eden. He gave Man everything he needed, including Woman, and called it good. Man had everything he needed. God gave Man one rule "don't eat of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil". Seriously, Man had everything he needed, so avoiding one tree shouldn't have been a problem right? Well enter Lucifer (aka Satan). Satan comes up to Woman and questions God's command. "Did God really say that?". Eventually Woman eats the fruit and Man joins right in with her. *BOOM* Man has joined Lucifer in his rebellion. That act declared war on God. God is sovereign and has to punish disobedience. We seem to forget that we declared war on God. We took His provision and threw it in His face. We declared war, and we blame Him?! But you say, "I wasn't there, I didn't eat the fruit!" Well Romans 5:14 says, "Yet death reigned from Adam to Moses, *even over those whose sinning was not like the transgression of Adam*, who was a type of the one who was to come." In Adam, all die. That is the Truth. Because of Adam's screw-up, we are to blame. Adam was Man's representative. Sorry folks, you lose before you start.
But then in steps Jesus! God became Man to be Man's representative again. By Jesus' sacrifice and pure obedience to God the Father, we can be redeemed. "For as by one man's disobedience the many were made sinners, so by the One Man's obedience the many will be made righteous." (Romans 5:19). Romans 5:12-21 talks about Death in Adam and Life in Christ. Matthew 4:17 says, "From that time Jesus began to preach, saying, 'Repent! For the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand.'" So, Jesus preached repentance. Repentance from what? What did I do? I was a good kid. I don't drink, smoke or chew...or date girls who do. I go to church. I don't oppose God. I'm a moral, upright citizen. Sorry, Stu, you lose though. Man rebelled and is at war with God. That is the Truth. If I choose not to accept that Truth, then guess what, I am rebelling! I must REPENT! I must do an about face, 180. I need to lay down my arms in an unconditional surrender. God is God. I know God, I know the Truth, yet I choose to not believe it. If I am not for God, I am against Him, there is no gray area. There are absolutes. If you want to sound smart and say "There are no absolutes", then you're really showing that you're a fool because you believe that statement is absolutely true. If that statement is not true, then there are absolutes! God is God, I am not, that is Truth. I have rebelled against a God who loves me. I need to repent and surrender! Every single day I must repent. The Christian life is one of repentance, according to Martin Luther.
The great thing is, once we repent, once we surrender, then we are adopted into His family. God takes us back! We become heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ! (Romans 8:17). We need to stop fighting the Kingdom in order to be admitted into the Kingdom. Remember, we were in the Garden, but we rebelled and God had to kick us out of the Garden. He provided a way for us to get back in though. Poor Lucifer, there is no way for him to get back in. He is pissed off. He hates us because we have the opportunity to go back. He is Hell-bent (literally) on taking as many people down with him as he can before the end. He wants us to feel justified. He wants us to harden our hearts. He wants to paint God as the enemy so that we can die and be apart from Him just like Lucifer has to be. But do not be deceived, dear reader. He is a liar. God is Truth. God loves you, and it's not too late for you to repent and re-join the Kingdom. Or, you can continue to harden your heart and fight the losing battle. You may feel justified, but in the end what does it get you?
I admit, if I say I am Elect then I sound like an arrogant ass. I, too, have struggled with the concept. But I read in Romans 9 that me questioning God is like the lump of clay questioning the potter. God is the Potter. I am clay. My opinion means nothing. If He wants to make me into a vase so that He can take a sledgehammer to me, then I have no choice. I rebelled against Him, so I deserve His wrath. But, He took His wrath on Himself at the Cross so that I wouldn't have to. Now my contention is not "Why am I condemned?" it is "Why would a holy God forgive me?". That realization is where my life ends, and Christ begins. Christianity is a relationship with God. It begins at repentance, which comes from humility. I had to let go of my pride. My prayer for you, dear reader, is that you daily relinquish your pride and allow God to be who He is. He promises salvation and reconciliation, but only after repentance. And, I've already stated in a previous post that He promises good to us who are reconciled to Him. He will either use your pride to bring about your destruction for His glory, like He did w/ Pharaoh in Exodus, or He will use your humility to reconcile you to Himself to use you for His glory. Either way, Soli Deo Gloria.
Many men far smarter or wiser than I am have debated this topic, so I do not claim to be any authority. I'm just writing out what I've discovered, and what I have grown to believe. The issue isn't Election, it's a "Yes/No" choice. You have the ability to say "Yes", but in saying "Yes" to God, you say "No" to yourself. It does literally cost you your life because you are no longer living for yourself, but for Him. I can only tell you what I know, and I know that I love God and I follow Him, and for some reason He blesses me. I don't deserve Him. But that's the point. Salvation comes from His mercy, not from anything we have done (Ephesians 2:8-9).
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Monday, May 30, 2011
Memorial Day
Hello, dear readers. I had thought I'd taken a week off or so from posting, but I see it's only been 4 days. Oh well.
I wanted to address Memorial Day. I can't put into words how grateful I am for all those men and women who have sacrificed, and are sacrificing, for our country. My brother-in-law is an Airman, my granddad was an MP in WW2, I have the privilege of knowing a NAVY Ensign, an ARMY Sergeant, and a Marine Lieutenant along with many other servicemen.
I've been raised to honor military personnel as heroes, and I do. I also get teary-eyed when I see commercials and movies about war and veterans, etc. My favorite war movie is possibly We Were Soldiers. I tear up every time I see the montage where the wives get the letters from Vietnam that their husbands have died...I can't even imagine. I don't want to try. I am not qualified to comment on war. As long as US Troops are in the field, I will support them.
I look forward to more blog posts as the days come, but in order to post, I must delve into Scripture so that the Holy Spirit can teach me. I feel the loss when I don't read. I love God, and I need to commune with Him.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
I wanted to address Memorial Day. I can't put into words how grateful I am for all those men and women who have sacrificed, and are sacrificing, for our country. My brother-in-law is an Airman, my granddad was an MP in WW2, I have the privilege of knowing a NAVY Ensign, an ARMY Sergeant, and a Marine Lieutenant along with many other servicemen.
I've been raised to honor military personnel as heroes, and I do. I also get teary-eyed when I see commercials and movies about war and veterans, etc. My favorite war movie is possibly We Were Soldiers. I tear up every time I see the montage where the wives get the letters from Vietnam that their husbands have died...I can't even imagine. I don't want to try. I am not qualified to comment on war. As long as US Troops are in the field, I will support them.
I look forward to more blog posts as the days come, but in order to post, I must delve into Scripture so that the Holy Spirit can teach me. I feel the loss when I don't read. I love God, and I need to commune with Him.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Explanation
Bender, it wasn't directed at you LoL. It was just a statement of part of the reason I believe what I believe. Still, you made some good points in your comment and I want to offer my explanation.
Bender said: "Hmm... I feel like I should respond to this since I think this was directed at me. As I said, I am not as familiar on this topic; I'm more comfortable dealing with the idea of theology philosphically within the context of the stories I know. So for the moment, let me just say this:
-Quoting religious texts is only going to get you so far. As I said, accounts from that far back can be quite sketchy at times. Everything must be taken with a grain of salt. Furthermore it is an edited text, and also one filtered by translation. Also, it's not even entirely consistent with itself. Naturally, the more unusual claims require more independent scruntiny.
-You seem to be assuming that honesty equals truth. They could simply be earnest but wrong. This is by no means a rarity in humanity.
-The problem with having people tell people who then tell people and so on, is that the message invariably gets jumbled along the way.
None of these are particularly gotchas, just things to keep in mind. It's not as simple as you've laid out. I would like to explore this further, but there's an awful lot to take in to appropriately comment on this global issue. I like to stick with what I know, so until then, I'll stay [relatively] quiet on those details."
Stuart answers:
"I'm more comfortable dealing with the idea of theology philosophically within the context of the stories I know." That's what I'm doing LoL. How do you 'know' those stories? What stories? Who told you? Were you there? I am truly asking. I'm not trying to throw questions back at you. Don't just say 'well the Bible isn't true' and move on...that's not keeping an open mind. Even I have to consider daily whether or not even I believe that the Bible is true, and the more I read it the more I see that it has to be. It all fits. If you look at the "My Purpose" post, I list verses starting in the Old Testament and going through to the New Testament and they all have the same message. That's just one small part of it. A big part of it is that I memorized Romans 8 (39 verses) and since most verses have other verses listed as references, I started writing those down as well. Starting in Romans 8:2, I have listed the verses 8:2 references, then all the verses those verses reference, and so on...from one verse I am at 15 pages of bullet pointed verses, and I am nowhere close to being done. That verse has roots in the Old Testament that go deep as well. I am blown away by it all. I hope that one day I can finish it and have a hard copy to show for it, but it's very time-consuming LoL. Remember, I'm not even at 8:3 yet and I'm going for 8:39. I believe that the Bible is the infallible, inerrant Word of God. Seriously, if God isn't big enough to organize His own book then He's not big enough to save me. If you have any particular contradictions that stick out to you, please tell me and I'll look into them. So far I have seen that the Bible fits together perfectly, and the God of the Old Testament is the same God of the New Testament. My faith is based on what the Bible says, so I will continue to use my 'religious text' to back up everything I believe.
Truth is objective. We can honestly believe a falsehood. I have faith that Jesus told the truth when He said, "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life. No man comes to the Father but through Me." (John 14:6)
The great thing about God is that the message is consistent even though He used people to actually write the Bible by putting pen to paper. The message of the Bible is the same now as it was thousands of years ago. Jesus Christ lived, died, and rose again. The Old Testament reveals the need for a Savior, and predicts the Savior, and the New Testament tells about the Savior and how He applies to our lives. This message has not been jumbled. And even if the words did get jumbled, the sacrifices of the apostles afterward in the name of Christ is enough to get me thinking. Here were 12 guys who thought that since Jesus was the Messiah, He would defeat the Romans and set up God's kingdom on earth through a show of power. James and John even asked Jesus to sit at His right hand and His left hand when He came into His glory. They argued over who would be Jesus' right hand man. All they cared about was 'suckling at the power teat' so to speak. Even His closest friends missed the point, and when He allowed Himself to be crucified the disciples ran and hid in a locked upper room for fear that they would be killed too just for having known Jesus. Then something happened (Jesus' resurrection and appearance to them in that locked upper room) that made them unify and preach His resurrection to the world...and it ultimately led to their deaths. I cannot ignore that change.
I am afraid that it is that simple. God created us, He loves us, He wants us to show our love for Him through obedience, we disobeyed, He had to punish us, we couldn't save ourselves, He stepped out of Heaven to save us Himself, and we have the choice to follow in that. It is a simple yes or no, I'm afraid. We are the ones who try to complicate it by putting a price tag on it.
Bender, thank you for commenting. Please keep doing so! Don't be afraid to give me specifics. I will humbly answer the best way I can. I will keep using the Bible as my reference though, because it lays out what I believe, so if you're not willing to meet me there then I doubt this discussion will go anywhere :) I don't mean that you have to accept the Bible as truth, just don't discount it right off the bat.
And, readers, you all have permission to comment or question me, not just Bender LoL. My e-mail is: stuartlkingsley@gmail.com
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Bender said: "Hmm... I feel like I should respond to this since I think this was directed at me. As I said, I am not as familiar on this topic; I'm more comfortable dealing with the idea of theology philosphically within the context of the stories I know. So for the moment, let me just say this:
-Quoting religious texts is only going to get you so far. As I said, accounts from that far back can be quite sketchy at times. Everything must be taken with a grain of salt. Furthermore it is an edited text, and also one filtered by translation. Also, it's not even entirely consistent with itself. Naturally, the more unusual claims require more independent scruntiny.
-You seem to be assuming that honesty equals truth. They could simply be earnest but wrong. This is by no means a rarity in humanity.
-The problem with having people tell people who then tell people and so on, is that the message invariably gets jumbled along the way.
None of these are particularly gotchas, just things to keep in mind. It's not as simple as you've laid out. I would like to explore this further, but there's an awful lot to take in to appropriately comment on this global issue. I like to stick with what I know, so until then, I'll stay [relatively] quiet on those details."
Stuart answers:
"I'm more comfortable dealing with the idea of theology philosophically within the context of the stories I know." That's what I'm doing LoL. How do you 'know' those stories? What stories? Who told you? Were you there? I am truly asking. I'm not trying to throw questions back at you. Don't just say 'well the Bible isn't true' and move on...that's not keeping an open mind. Even I have to consider daily whether or not even I believe that the Bible is true, and the more I read it the more I see that it has to be. It all fits. If you look at the "My Purpose" post, I list verses starting in the Old Testament and going through to the New Testament and they all have the same message. That's just one small part of it. A big part of it is that I memorized Romans 8 (39 verses) and since most verses have other verses listed as references, I started writing those down as well. Starting in Romans 8:2, I have listed the verses 8:2 references, then all the verses those verses reference, and so on...from one verse I am at 15 pages of bullet pointed verses, and I am nowhere close to being done. That verse has roots in the Old Testament that go deep as well. I am blown away by it all. I hope that one day I can finish it and have a hard copy to show for it, but it's very time-consuming LoL. Remember, I'm not even at 8:3 yet and I'm going for 8:39. I believe that the Bible is the infallible, inerrant Word of God. Seriously, if God isn't big enough to organize His own book then He's not big enough to save me. If you have any particular contradictions that stick out to you, please tell me and I'll look into them. So far I have seen that the Bible fits together perfectly, and the God of the Old Testament is the same God of the New Testament. My faith is based on what the Bible says, so I will continue to use my 'religious text' to back up everything I believe.
Truth is objective. We can honestly believe a falsehood. I have faith that Jesus told the truth when He said, "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life. No man comes to the Father but through Me." (John 14:6)
The great thing about God is that the message is consistent even though He used people to actually write the Bible by putting pen to paper. The message of the Bible is the same now as it was thousands of years ago. Jesus Christ lived, died, and rose again. The Old Testament reveals the need for a Savior, and predicts the Savior, and the New Testament tells about the Savior and how He applies to our lives. This message has not been jumbled. And even if the words did get jumbled, the sacrifices of the apostles afterward in the name of Christ is enough to get me thinking. Here were 12 guys who thought that since Jesus was the Messiah, He would defeat the Romans and set up God's kingdom on earth through a show of power. James and John even asked Jesus to sit at His right hand and His left hand when He came into His glory. They argued over who would be Jesus' right hand man. All they cared about was 'suckling at the power teat' so to speak. Even His closest friends missed the point, and when He allowed Himself to be crucified the disciples ran and hid in a locked upper room for fear that they would be killed too just for having known Jesus. Then something happened (Jesus' resurrection and appearance to them in that locked upper room) that made them unify and preach His resurrection to the world...and it ultimately led to their deaths. I cannot ignore that change.
I am afraid that it is that simple. God created us, He loves us, He wants us to show our love for Him through obedience, we disobeyed, He had to punish us, we couldn't save ourselves, He stepped out of Heaven to save us Himself, and we have the choice to follow in that. It is a simple yes or no, I'm afraid. We are the ones who try to complicate it by putting a price tag on it.
Bender, thank you for commenting. Please keep doing so! Don't be afraid to give me specifics. I will humbly answer the best way I can. I will keep using the Bible as my reference though, because it lays out what I believe, so if you're not willing to meet me there then I doubt this discussion will go anywhere :) I don't mean that you have to accept the Bible as truth, just don't discount it right off the bat.
And, readers, you all have permission to comment or question me, not just Bender LoL. My e-mail is: stuartlkingsley@gmail.com
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Jesus Is Alive
He is RISEN!
R: Recorded Accounts -- Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, etc.
I: Identifiable Change -- Simon Peter denied knowing Christ 3 times leading up to His crucifixion. Somehow, Peter ended up being crucified upside down because he wouldn't renounce Christ...and he didn't feel worthy to be crucified the same way Jesus was. Saul hunted and killed Christians, but he had an encounter with Jesus and became Paul, one of the heroes of our faith. Out of 12 apostles, one killed himself, one was boiled alive (John) but didn't die so he was exiled and wrote Revelation. The other 10 were martyred. If it were a lie, someone would have been like "I'm lying, please don't kill me!"
S: Sunday Worship -- Shift from the Sabbath (Saturday) to the first day of the week (Sunday) worship.
E: Eye-Witnesses -- People saw Him after the fact. Thomas touched His scars. Over 500 people were reported to have seen Him afterward. The two men on the road to Emmaus saw Him, but didn't know it was Him at first. They told someone, who told someone, who told someone...who told me :)
N: No Body -- Produce a body, Christianity dies. Nobody even tried to fake it! Nobody disputes that the tomb was empty.
Have I seen Jesus? No. Have I heard His voice to where I can say "that sounds like Jesus"? No. Do I believe He is risen? Absolutely YES.
Jesus was God incarnate. He didn't come to earth for a crown. He came for a cross. Don't get it twisted...He is coming back, and this time He is coming to conquer. Whose side are you on?
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
R: Recorded Accounts -- Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, etc.
I: Identifiable Change -- Simon Peter denied knowing Christ 3 times leading up to His crucifixion. Somehow, Peter ended up being crucified upside down because he wouldn't renounce Christ...and he didn't feel worthy to be crucified the same way Jesus was. Saul hunted and killed Christians, but he had an encounter with Jesus and became Paul, one of the heroes of our faith. Out of 12 apostles, one killed himself, one was boiled alive (John) but didn't die so he was exiled and wrote Revelation. The other 10 were martyred. If it were a lie, someone would have been like "I'm lying, please don't kill me!"
S: Sunday Worship -- Shift from the Sabbath (Saturday) to the first day of the week (Sunday) worship.
E: Eye-Witnesses -- People saw Him after the fact. Thomas touched His scars. Over 500 people were reported to have seen Him afterward. The two men on the road to Emmaus saw Him, but didn't know it was Him at first. They told someone, who told someone, who told someone...who told me :)
N: No Body -- Produce a body, Christianity dies. Nobody even tried to fake it! Nobody disputes that the tomb was empty.
Have I seen Jesus? No. Have I heard His voice to where I can say "that sounds like Jesus"? No. Do I believe He is risen? Absolutely YES.
Jesus was God incarnate. He didn't come to earth for a crown. He came for a cross. Don't get it twisted...He is coming back, and this time He is coming to conquer. Whose side are you on?
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
I Have a Purpose
This is what God tells me through His Word:
"For You formed my inward parts; You knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are Your works; my soul knows this very well." -- Psalm 139:13-14
"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations." -- Jeremiah 1:5
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope." -- Jeremiah 29:11
"For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them." -- Ephesians 2:10
"And I am sure of this, that He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at he day of Christ Jesus." -- Philippians 1:6
I am not a mistake. God knew what He was doing before He created me. He created me knowing full well my sins would crucify Him. He has a plan for my life, and each day He reveals more of it. He plans good things for me, even when things seem dark. In the Old Testament and New, He remains the same. His love endures forever.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
"For You formed my inward parts; You knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are Your works; my soul knows this very well." -- Psalm 139:13-14
"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations." -- Jeremiah 1:5
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope." -- Jeremiah 29:11
"For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them." -- Ephesians 2:10
"And I am sure of this, that He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at he day of Christ Jesus." -- Philippians 1:6
I am not a mistake. God knew what He was doing before He created me. He created me knowing full well my sins would crucify Him. He has a plan for my life, and each day He reveals more of it. He plans good things for me, even when things seem dark. In the Old Testament and New, He remains the same. His love endures forever.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Question #1
Question #1 from Bender:
"The first question I'd like to pose concerns your 'My Story' post. You say, 'I accepted Christ when I was 3 years old,' which seems like a very odd claim to me. What exactly do you mean? How exactly is a 3 year old supposed to actively participate in something as heavy as religion? I mean, I was a pretty smart kid, but I was terrified of GRASS at that age. (Or so I'm told; I don't actually remember anything from that period.)"
Great question, Bender. Honestly, that's when I realized that Jesus was God's Son and that He loved me, and that I wanted to go to Heaven when I died. I had no real concept of sin or any clue why I needed a Savior, it was just the next step for me since I grew up with Christian parents, church, and a Christian school. There are some Christian scholars who would argue that I wasn't 'saved', or whatever, but I knew that I was going to Heaven when I died. I knew that sin was bad and obedience was good, so I did my best to honor my parents and do what God said. Jesus Himself didn't discount the children, but rather said "let them come". He also said that faith like a child is required to enter His kingdom because children believe whole-heartedly.
As I grew, even though I became more aware of my sin, I got into a legalistic mind set. "Well, I'm not as bad as that person, so I'm okay." I was a darn good guy! I was well-liked, etc. I did my parents proud. And, I assumed God loved me because I did all those things. But after my failure in 2008 I realized just how corrupt I really was. Sin became a reality. My sin still wasn't "that bad", but it was bad enough to wreck my livelihood at the time. God was basically telling me "Hey, you're Mine, time to grow up! I love you, so let's start building!" And I clung to Him. It wasn't until after those 2 camps in 2009 that I actually felt saved. Everything clicked for me. Sin, the need for a Savior, everything. I started following Him and only Him. I stopped trying to make my life better on my own. Jesus said "He who finds his life will lose it, but he who loses His life for my sake will find it." (see "Cost" post).
So, to sum up, whether I was technically 'in' or not at age 3 (I believe I was) I was fighting for His Kingdom since age 3. I had some wayward times, but He was ever faithful to keep me out of too much trouble. It is hard for a 3-yr old to participate in 'religion', but Christianity is a personal relationship w/ Jesus Christ, and He wants us just how we are. He meets us where we are and grows us from there. It is quite amazing.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
"The first question I'd like to pose concerns your 'My Story' post. You say, 'I accepted Christ when I was 3 years old,' which seems like a very odd claim to me. What exactly do you mean? How exactly is a 3 year old supposed to actively participate in something as heavy as religion? I mean, I was a pretty smart kid, but I was terrified of GRASS at that age. (Or so I'm told; I don't actually remember anything from that period.)"
Great question, Bender. Honestly, that's when I realized that Jesus was God's Son and that He loved me, and that I wanted to go to Heaven when I died. I had no real concept of sin or any clue why I needed a Savior, it was just the next step for me since I grew up with Christian parents, church, and a Christian school. There are some Christian scholars who would argue that I wasn't 'saved', or whatever, but I knew that I was going to Heaven when I died. I knew that sin was bad and obedience was good, so I did my best to honor my parents and do what God said. Jesus Himself didn't discount the children, but rather said "let them come". He also said that faith like a child is required to enter His kingdom because children believe whole-heartedly.
As I grew, even though I became more aware of my sin, I got into a legalistic mind set. "Well, I'm not as bad as that person, so I'm okay." I was a darn good guy! I was well-liked, etc. I did my parents proud. And, I assumed God loved me because I did all those things. But after my failure in 2008 I realized just how corrupt I really was. Sin became a reality. My sin still wasn't "that bad", but it was bad enough to wreck my livelihood at the time. God was basically telling me "Hey, you're Mine, time to grow up! I love you, so let's start building!" And I clung to Him. It wasn't until after those 2 camps in 2009 that I actually felt saved. Everything clicked for me. Sin, the need for a Savior, everything. I started following Him and only Him. I stopped trying to make my life better on my own. Jesus said "He who finds his life will lose it, but he who loses His life for my sake will find it." (see "Cost" post).
So, to sum up, whether I was technically 'in' or not at age 3 (I believe I was) I was fighting for His Kingdom since age 3. I had some wayward times, but He was ever faithful to keep me out of too much trouble. It is hard for a 3-yr old to participate in 'religion', but Christianity is a personal relationship w/ Jesus Christ, and He wants us just how we are. He meets us where we are and grows us from there. It is quite amazing.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Monday, May 23, 2011
Bender
Okay, so the light font on dark background apparently wasn't working. So, we'll try this for the time being.
Okay, dear readers, I've been offered a "challenge" of sorts. Remember how I said this whole "Sticks and Stones" idea began at GHP 2003? Well, so did my friendship with Derek "Bender" Kolacinski. He and I are pretty much as opposite as opposites come, but we're still friends. He had the idea to bounce questions off of each other and answer each other in our blogs. I am not entirely sure how it will work, so I'll let him start it off. The link to his blog is in the Comments section of my "Fight Club" post.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Okay, dear readers, I've been offered a "challenge" of sorts. Remember how I said this whole "Sticks and Stones" idea began at GHP 2003? Well, so did my friendship with Derek "Bender" Kolacinski. He and I are pretty much as opposite as opposites come, but we're still friends. He had the idea to bounce questions off of each other and answer each other in our blogs. I am not entirely sure how it will work, so I'll let him start it off. The link to his blog is in the Comments section of my "Fight Club" post.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Fight Club
Before I start, I just want to explain something. The reason my blog is rather plain is because I am colorblind. I use Red and Black because I can see those colors, and I know they go well together. If someone wants to help me make this blog more aesthetically pleasing, I'm willing to meet and accept help :)
I'm breaking Rule #1 with this post, but I really don't care. We're doing the world a disservice if we keep what God is doing through us contained in the WFBC Basement.
In August 2009, I got a call from a good buddy of mine inviting me to something called "Fight Club" at Watkinsville First Baptist Church. He said it was "right up my alley". He picked me up from my apartment, and drove me to WFBC. I had gone to WFBC once before that, but hadn't returned. I had been attending Athens Church, and was just starting a Community Group there. Fight Club was indeed up my alley. The College Pastor at WFBC, "General" Vic Doss, started Fight Club because God gave him a desire to grow a group of men to be totally sold out for God. Our motto is "Be Men, Fight Sin, Love Jesus, Lead Well". That truly sums it up. We started a journey that night, and after 2 full school years of attending (I seriously do not think I have missed one night except in the summer) I am blown away by what God has done. I've seen good friends get married and engaged to wonderful women, knowing full well what training they have received, and that is a huge praise for me. I have seen boys become men. General Vic's plan at the outset was to put an older man in front of us to share his testimony. We referred to it as veterans teaching green recruits. My concept of my own masculinity had been utterly destroyed, so I drank in everything I learned and stepped up to every challenge every time I could. One of the first men to share his life with us was "Papa" Fred Schuller. I owe a lot to this man. Through the course of the years we had other older men step up, like John Deans, to lead and share their lives with us. That format continued throughout the first year with some topical teaching from General Vic thrown in. Then in the summer of 2010, I remember the night, we were talking about how so many Freshman boys were coming in for Orientation who would be swept up into other organizations quickly and not seek to grow in Christ. Indeed, most may not have even known Him. I don't remember exactly who mentioned that we should go talk to them about Jesus and invite them to church, but I remember General Vic saying "Ok, we'll go tomorrow." and that was that. About a year later, among all of us, we've spoken to close to, or over, 1000 guys on campus in a personal setting. While I don't remember whose idea it was to start talking to guys on campus, I do know we would have fizzled out if it weren't for John Deans kicking us in the pants and providing materials for us to keep the materials and presentation fresh. John and Vic hatched the idea for the 21-Day Challenge last October where we handed out 500 New Testaments to guys at the Tate Student Center and challenged them to read one chapter of John a day for 21 days and to pray a prayer before each chapter saying, "God, if you're real and Jesus is the way, then reveal Yourself to me in a way that I can understand." Hence, the challenge. When we ran out of the first 500, we got 500 more...and then 500 more :) In the epic words of my good friend Chad, "This is what Christian men do!" This past April we teamed up with the girls from the WFBC College Ministry and Team United, the athletic ministry at UGA, and took over the Tate Plaza for "The Great Exchange". I was one of many students to share their testimony from the platform to students walking by, and there were many others in the crowd carrying on personal conversations with students who stopped to listen. It was a huge event that wouldn't have happened without John Deans being faithful to the calling God put on his heart. Though the formal meetings are over for this school year, and we seek to try a new format next school year, I am blown away.
I know a lot of Fight Club guys are reading my blog, and I thank you brothers! I was honored to teach and share my testimony in front of the group this year, and it was so humbling. I had failed in my masculinity. I had failed to protect the girl I said I cared about. I had failed miserably. God was in the process of building me back, and Fight Club was more than I ever could have hoped for. Up til that point in 2009 I had been trying to recover and grow on my own, and God knew I needed brothers beside me. I walked into that Basement and I only knew the guy who brought me. Most of the guys were WFBC regulars, so I felt rather out of place. I had brought my stick, and was accepted for it. From the first explanation of General Vic's plan for the group, I knew I was hooked. I remember the night General Vic gave us a card with accountability questions and told us to pair up with someone and actually hold each other accountable. He told us that if we didn't do that, then we shouldn't bother to come back. He either wanted us to be serious about dying to ourselves and growing in Christ, or to not waste our time or his. I needed that kick in the pants. I paired up with my good friend and began meeting weekly. I was also meeting with my best friend weekly. Maybe I'll brag on my best friend more once I get his permission to. Still, something was missing. I only saw these guys once a week, and I didn't really know them. They all knew each other and had developed their own bonds. I still felt like an outsider. God took care of that last year by telling me to jump into WFBC fully. Now, Fight Club was started for college-age guys and we had adult men who were leaders. I came in as a 25-yr old grad student so I was kinda in between. It didn't matter. I got involved in the Underground (WFBC's middle school youth group) and high school guys started coming to Fight Club too. We are looking for men, regardless of age. In fact, seeing these high school guys get serious ministers to me in a way I cannot describe. I was a broken, beaten, bloody boy when I first stepped into that basement. I didn't deserve what I got through Fight Club. I know I'm nowhere near perfect, and I'm still growing, but I truly feel like a man now. I'm trained and fighting. I'm not just defensive, I'm on the offensive.
We talked about a man needing 3 things: 1) A Will to Obey, 2) A Work to Do, and 3) A Woman to Love. I have a strong will to obey now. God has made me fearless, and I'm ready to do whatever He calls me to do. That leads into my work to do. Right now my work is to make an A in my class and serve well in my part-time job. I also will serve my church family if they need me. As for the 3rd one...well...I have no clue. My previous failure had me feeling unworthy for the longest time. I know I'll never be worthy, and I'm not guaranteed a wife. Still, God laid her on my heart in 2009 and I have been praying for her. I have no idea who she is. It's a good thing my purpose hinges on #1 and not #3. Matthew 6:33 says to seek Him first and then all these things will be added. He doesn't specify which things, but He promises that they will be good. He also promises to finish what He started. I hope to one day join the ranks of my Fight Club brothers who have "out-kicked their coverage" as General Vic puts it.
So that's just a brief overview. I need to give a huge shout out to my brother in arms Aaron Yankey for encouraging me to write. Aaron is a wordsmith...that's the best way I can put it. He definitely provides a literary, rhetorical and oratory example for me to follow. God has an army, and I'm so blessed to have my place in the shield wall.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
I'm breaking Rule #1 with this post, but I really don't care. We're doing the world a disservice if we keep what God is doing through us contained in the WFBC Basement.
In August 2009, I got a call from a good buddy of mine inviting me to something called "Fight Club" at Watkinsville First Baptist Church. He said it was "right up my alley". He picked me up from my apartment, and drove me to WFBC. I had gone to WFBC once before that, but hadn't returned. I had been attending Athens Church, and was just starting a Community Group there. Fight Club was indeed up my alley. The College Pastor at WFBC, "General" Vic Doss, started Fight Club because God gave him a desire to grow a group of men to be totally sold out for God. Our motto is "Be Men, Fight Sin, Love Jesus, Lead Well". That truly sums it up. We started a journey that night, and after 2 full school years of attending (I seriously do not think I have missed one night except in the summer) I am blown away by what God has done. I've seen good friends get married and engaged to wonderful women, knowing full well what training they have received, and that is a huge praise for me. I have seen boys become men. General Vic's plan at the outset was to put an older man in front of us to share his testimony. We referred to it as veterans teaching green recruits. My concept of my own masculinity had been utterly destroyed, so I drank in everything I learned and stepped up to every challenge every time I could. One of the first men to share his life with us was "Papa" Fred Schuller. I owe a lot to this man. Through the course of the years we had other older men step up, like John Deans, to lead and share their lives with us. That format continued throughout the first year with some topical teaching from General Vic thrown in. Then in the summer of 2010, I remember the night, we were talking about how so many Freshman boys were coming in for Orientation who would be swept up into other organizations quickly and not seek to grow in Christ. Indeed, most may not have even known Him. I don't remember exactly who mentioned that we should go talk to them about Jesus and invite them to church, but I remember General Vic saying "Ok, we'll go tomorrow." and that was that. About a year later, among all of us, we've spoken to close to, or over, 1000 guys on campus in a personal setting. While I don't remember whose idea it was to start talking to guys on campus, I do know we would have fizzled out if it weren't for John Deans kicking us in the pants and providing materials for us to keep the materials and presentation fresh. John and Vic hatched the idea for the 21-Day Challenge last October where we handed out 500 New Testaments to guys at the Tate Student Center and challenged them to read one chapter of John a day for 21 days and to pray a prayer before each chapter saying, "God, if you're real and Jesus is the way, then reveal Yourself to me in a way that I can understand." Hence, the challenge. When we ran out of the first 500, we got 500 more...and then 500 more :) In the epic words of my good friend Chad, "This is what Christian men do!" This past April we teamed up with the girls from the WFBC College Ministry and Team United, the athletic ministry at UGA, and took over the Tate Plaza for "The Great Exchange". I was one of many students to share their testimony from the platform to students walking by, and there were many others in the crowd carrying on personal conversations with students who stopped to listen. It was a huge event that wouldn't have happened without John Deans being faithful to the calling God put on his heart. Though the formal meetings are over for this school year, and we seek to try a new format next school year, I am blown away.
I know a lot of Fight Club guys are reading my blog, and I thank you brothers! I was honored to teach and share my testimony in front of the group this year, and it was so humbling. I had failed in my masculinity. I had failed to protect the girl I said I cared about. I had failed miserably. God was in the process of building me back, and Fight Club was more than I ever could have hoped for. Up til that point in 2009 I had been trying to recover and grow on my own, and God knew I needed brothers beside me. I walked into that Basement and I only knew the guy who brought me. Most of the guys were WFBC regulars, so I felt rather out of place. I had brought my stick, and was accepted for it. From the first explanation of General Vic's plan for the group, I knew I was hooked. I remember the night General Vic gave us a card with accountability questions and told us to pair up with someone and actually hold each other accountable. He told us that if we didn't do that, then we shouldn't bother to come back. He either wanted us to be serious about dying to ourselves and growing in Christ, or to not waste our time or his. I needed that kick in the pants. I paired up with my good friend and began meeting weekly. I was also meeting with my best friend weekly. Maybe I'll brag on my best friend more once I get his permission to. Still, something was missing. I only saw these guys once a week, and I didn't really know them. They all knew each other and had developed their own bonds. I still felt like an outsider. God took care of that last year by telling me to jump into WFBC fully. Now, Fight Club was started for college-age guys and we had adult men who were leaders. I came in as a 25-yr old grad student so I was kinda in between. It didn't matter. I got involved in the Underground (WFBC's middle school youth group) and high school guys started coming to Fight Club too. We are looking for men, regardless of age. In fact, seeing these high school guys get serious ministers to me in a way I cannot describe. I was a broken, beaten, bloody boy when I first stepped into that basement. I didn't deserve what I got through Fight Club. I know I'm nowhere near perfect, and I'm still growing, but I truly feel like a man now. I'm trained and fighting. I'm not just defensive, I'm on the offensive.
We talked about a man needing 3 things: 1) A Will to Obey, 2) A Work to Do, and 3) A Woman to Love. I have a strong will to obey now. God has made me fearless, and I'm ready to do whatever He calls me to do. That leads into my work to do. Right now my work is to make an A in my class and serve well in my part-time job. I also will serve my church family if they need me. As for the 3rd one...well...I have no clue. My previous failure had me feeling unworthy for the longest time. I know I'll never be worthy, and I'm not guaranteed a wife. Still, God laid her on my heart in 2009 and I have been praying for her. I have no idea who she is. It's a good thing my purpose hinges on #1 and not #3. Matthew 6:33 says to seek Him first and then all these things will be added. He doesn't specify which things, but He promises that they will be good. He also promises to finish what He started. I hope to one day join the ranks of my Fight Club brothers who have "out-kicked their coverage" as General Vic puts it.
So that's just a brief overview. I need to give a huge shout out to my brother in arms Aaron Yankey for encouraging me to write. Aaron is a wordsmith...that's the best way I can put it. He definitely provides a literary, rhetorical and oratory example for me to follow. God has an army, and I'm so blessed to have my place in the shield wall.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Saturday, May 21, 2011
The Cost
We're all told to "count the cost" when we consider following Christ. When we're told that following Christ will cost us our life, we automatically picture ourselves dying horribly in His name. We hear the stories of martyrs, and assume that that will be our fate as well. Granted, Jesus Himself was brutally murdered, Paul and John the Baptist were quietly beheaded, and 10 of the original 12 disciples were martyred as well. This is what we believe, people. The more I think about it, what better way to die? We all want to die for something, right? Deep down, you know you want to die for something greater than yourself. We all want to be heroes. But, what is death really? Death is the end of biological life on earth. None can escape it, save a select few special people that God set apart. The old phrase "If it were easy, everyone would do it." means that death is the easiest thing to do. If following Christ costs us our lives in the sense that we just die for Him, then that is way too easy. We'd be one of those cults with the Kool-Aid. Even Paul said dying to be with Christ is far better than staying on earth to worry about earthly problems. (Philippians 1:23). I once read someone who asked "If Christians really believed in Heaven, why don't they all just commit suicide?". Good question, actually. I've asked myself that before. Here's the answer I came up with:
Following Christ costs us our life because we die to our own desires. We put to death the desires of the flesh. Paul talks about that extensively in his letters. Die to self, die to sin. Mortification of the flesh. All we have is time really. How do we spend our time? Do we find Christ and live the same life we lived before Him? If that's the case then did we really find Him? No, we have to give up our lives to Him. We have to give up our livelihoods to Him. We have to reach a point where we say "Lord, the girl, the car, the house, the dog, the job, the money, everything is worthless. I only want You." We have to give up living out our own desires and live for His desires. See, I believe we Christians don't just off ourselves because we understand that Jesus is the only hope for a dying world, and we need to spend the rest of the time we have making His Name known and advancing His kingdom. Yes, it costs our lives, it doesn't mean we just die for Him. I would love to die for Christ, but will I live for Him?
One of the blessings I received from The Underground this semester was a copy of David Platt's Radical. Now, I admit right now I tend to avoid spiritual help books (Haha, and I want to write one!). I heard about the concept of Radical and immediately thought, "Great. If I don't sell everything I have and go witness to the Bedouins in Algeria then I'm not a Christian." And...that's what the book basically says, but not in that context. Platt literally took every excuse I could think of and buried it in Scripture. Now, that doesn't mean I'm going to sell everything I have and move to Algeria tomorrow (though when I read Chapter 7 I started going through the logistics in my mind. Hah!) but it does mean that I understand the sense of urgency. Now, I'm not going to point fingers or say "you should..." or anything. Remember, this blog is a declaration of my own experiences that I hope will help you as well. What am I doing to help advance Christ's Kingdom here on earth? What am I doing to attack Satan's Dominion to the point where he has to throw everything he has against me so that I can take pressure off of other brothers and sisters on the battle lines? Will my life matter? Does my life count? Does following Christ cost me anything? I have to say that right now, no, it doesn't. Sure, it costs me time, but that's time conveniently scheduled during the week. He provides everything I need, and even some things I like to have but don't need. What am I sacrificing? I schedule time for Him after I'm done with class and work. Now, don't get me wrong, I can worship Him through class and work and I do my best to. I try to make A's and honor my bosses and colleagues. I try to live my life for Him every day. I lay my reputation at His feet. Romans 12:1 says "I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual act of worship." That basically says it all. Also, consider Jesus saying "whoever finds his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it" (Matthew 10:39; Matthew 16:25; Mark 8:35; Luke 9:24). We are to present our bodies as a 'living' sacrifice and that is our 'spiritual' act of worship. A physical act worships in spirit as well. Works don't save me, but am I bearing fruit? I believe I am bearing fruit now where I wasn't before, and I hope to continue to grow. Seriously, if I plant an apple seed I expect an apple tree and not a grape vine. If the seed of the Spirit is planted in me then one should expect to see the fruit of the Spirit growing out of me.
Galatians 5:22-23 lists the fruit of the Spirit: "The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law." Am I loving people? Not just loving a girlfriend or a wife, but am I going out of my way to sacrifice for people? Do I have joy, and can people see that I have joy in any circumstance? Do I not only experience peace, but seek to spread it as well? Am I patient? Am I kind? Am I good? Am I faithful and reliable? Am I gentle? Do I exhibit self-control in my life to where people can see it? If I'm honest with myself, God is giving me a growing heart for strangers and people in need. I do not feel that I have joy most times. I'm either happy or sad, but joy should transcend feelings. Lately, especially this week, I've delighted in Him despite how I felt, so I do feel the seed of joy sprouting in me, but it's still tiny. I'm very militaristic, I view spirituality as a war. I'm quick to seek retribution if I'm wronged. No, I do not consider myself a peacemaker. In terms of inner peace and lack of worry, I'm getting better though. No, I am not patient, that's why I loved Habakkuk 2:2 and 2:3 (see Habakkuk post). I'd like to think I'm kind. I'm a big Teddy Bear, but sometimes I feel like the Teddy Bear from "Hunter: The Reckoning" (props if you get the reference). I am in no ways good. Only God is good, as Jesus told the Rich Young Ruler. I would like to think I'm faithful and reliable. I do my best to be loyal and dependable. I think I'm gentle too. Self-control...nope...nope...*sigh*
So, I count the cost and adjust accordingly. I cannot do this on my own. I daily, desperately need the Spirit to intercede for me. I have a long way to go. Justification is instant, Sanctification is slow. I'd like to think I'll die for Him. I'd like to think I could give my life up for someone else. I'd like to die a hero. I'd like to leave a legacy. Not just a legacy that would put me in history books that will burn, but a legacy that lasts for eternity. I want to maximize the number of people who are in Heaven because I did my duty and minimize the number of people who are in Hell because I didn't. That is a humble, sobering thought. Each day, each breath, each word I owe to Him who paid the ultimate price to redeem what He already had the rights to. I will continue to fail, continue to fall, but by His grace I will continue to get back up.
I love you all. Thank you for reading. I'll try to slow down so that you can catch up on the reading. I saw that I'm over 50 page views, so thank you to my mother for visiting this site 50 times ;) No, seriously, thank you to all of you who read this. I hope it can grow into something, and I hope that you will keep coming back. And, if you see me at church or in class, feel free to ask me anything or call me out on anything. I do all of this humbly in order that God may receive all the glory. I didn't care about writing things down until 2009 and then again I didn't care about writing things like this until a month or so ago. This is just more fruit.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Following Christ costs us our life because we die to our own desires. We put to death the desires of the flesh. Paul talks about that extensively in his letters. Die to self, die to sin. Mortification of the flesh. All we have is time really. How do we spend our time? Do we find Christ and live the same life we lived before Him? If that's the case then did we really find Him? No, we have to give up our lives to Him. We have to give up our livelihoods to Him. We have to reach a point where we say "Lord, the girl, the car, the house, the dog, the job, the money, everything is worthless. I only want You." We have to give up living out our own desires and live for His desires. See, I believe we Christians don't just off ourselves because we understand that Jesus is the only hope for a dying world, and we need to spend the rest of the time we have making His Name known and advancing His kingdom. Yes, it costs our lives, it doesn't mean we just die for Him. I would love to die for Christ, but will I live for Him?
One of the blessings I received from The Underground this semester was a copy of David Platt's Radical. Now, I admit right now I tend to avoid spiritual help books (Haha, and I want to write one!). I heard about the concept of Radical and immediately thought, "Great. If I don't sell everything I have and go witness to the Bedouins in Algeria then I'm not a Christian." And...that's what the book basically says, but not in that context. Platt literally took every excuse I could think of and buried it in Scripture. Now, that doesn't mean I'm going to sell everything I have and move to Algeria tomorrow (though when I read Chapter 7 I started going through the logistics in my mind. Hah!) but it does mean that I understand the sense of urgency. Now, I'm not going to point fingers or say "you should..." or anything. Remember, this blog is a declaration of my own experiences that I hope will help you as well. What am I doing to help advance Christ's Kingdom here on earth? What am I doing to attack Satan's Dominion to the point where he has to throw everything he has against me so that I can take pressure off of other brothers and sisters on the battle lines? Will my life matter? Does my life count? Does following Christ cost me anything? I have to say that right now, no, it doesn't. Sure, it costs me time, but that's time conveniently scheduled during the week. He provides everything I need, and even some things I like to have but don't need. What am I sacrificing? I schedule time for Him after I'm done with class and work. Now, don't get me wrong, I can worship Him through class and work and I do my best to. I try to make A's and honor my bosses and colleagues. I try to live my life for Him every day. I lay my reputation at His feet. Romans 12:1 says "I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual act of worship." That basically says it all. Also, consider Jesus saying "whoever finds his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it" (Matthew 10:39; Matthew 16:25; Mark 8:35; Luke 9:24). We are to present our bodies as a 'living' sacrifice and that is our 'spiritual' act of worship. A physical act worships in spirit as well. Works don't save me, but am I bearing fruit? I believe I am bearing fruit now where I wasn't before, and I hope to continue to grow. Seriously, if I plant an apple seed I expect an apple tree and not a grape vine. If the seed of the Spirit is planted in me then one should expect to see the fruit of the Spirit growing out of me.
Galatians 5:22-23 lists the fruit of the Spirit: "The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law." Am I loving people? Not just loving a girlfriend or a wife, but am I going out of my way to sacrifice for people? Do I have joy, and can people see that I have joy in any circumstance? Do I not only experience peace, but seek to spread it as well? Am I patient? Am I kind? Am I good? Am I faithful and reliable? Am I gentle? Do I exhibit self-control in my life to where people can see it? If I'm honest with myself, God is giving me a growing heart for strangers and people in need. I do not feel that I have joy most times. I'm either happy or sad, but joy should transcend feelings. Lately, especially this week, I've delighted in Him despite how I felt, so I do feel the seed of joy sprouting in me, but it's still tiny. I'm very militaristic, I view spirituality as a war. I'm quick to seek retribution if I'm wronged. No, I do not consider myself a peacemaker. In terms of inner peace and lack of worry, I'm getting better though. No, I am not patient, that's why I loved Habakkuk 2:2 and 2:3 (see Habakkuk post). I'd like to think I'm kind. I'm a big Teddy Bear, but sometimes I feel like the Teddy Bear from "Hunter: The Reckoning" (props if you get the reference). I am in no ways good. Only God is good, as Jesus told the Rich Young Ruler. I would like to think I'm faithful and reliable. I do my best to be loyal and dependable. I think I'm gentle too. Self-control...nope...nope...*sigh*
So, I count the cost and adjust accordingly. I cannot do this on my own. I daily, desperately need the Spirit to intercede for me. I have a long way to go. Justification is instant, Sanctification is slow. I'd like to think I'll die for Him. I'd like to think I could give my life up for someone else. I'd like to die a hero. I'd like to leave a legacy. Not just a legacy that would put me in history books that will burn, but a legacy that lasts for eternity. I want to maximize the number of people who are in Heaven because I did my duty and minimize the number of people who are in Hell because I didn't. That is a humble, sobering thought. Each day, each breath, each word I owe to Him who paid the ultimate price to redeem what He already had the rights to. I will continue to fail, continue to fall, but by His grace I will continue to get back up.
I love you all. Thank you for reading. I'll try to slow down so that you can catch up on the reading. I saw that I'm over 50 page views, so thank you to my mother for visiting this site 50 times ;) No, seriously, thank you to all of you who read this. I hope it can grow into something, and I hope that you will keep coming back. And, if you see me at church or in class, feel free to ask me anything or call me out on anything. I do all of this humbly in order that God may receive all the glory. I didn't care about writing things down until 2009 and then again I didn't care about writing things like this until a month or so ago. This is just more fruit.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
My Story
Wretched man that I am! I have determined to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ and Him crucified, so that your faith may not rest in the wisdom of men but in the power of God. He did not send me to baptize but to preach the Gospel, and not with words of eloquent wisdom, lest the Cross of Christ be emptied of its power. The Word of the Cross is folly to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong. Though I am free from all people, I choose to be a slave so that I can win more people. My boast is in Jesus Christ alone.
Okay, for those of you who read your Bibles, that first paragraph was just a string of verses: Romans 7:24, 1 Corinthians 2:2, 1 Corinthians 2:5, 1 Corinthians 1:17, 1 Corinthians 1:18, 1 Corinthians 1:27, 1 Corinthians 9:19, and the last sentence refers to Jeremiah 9:23-24. I think it fits my testimony quite well now. I wrote an introductory post, but I thought I'd give you my testimony so that you will know where I'm coming from as I continue to write on this blog.
I was born August 23, 1985 to two Christian parents. I was raised in a Christian home. I attended Community Bible Church. I attended Kindergarten through 8th grade at Community Christian Academy. I was a Bible whiz kid. I accepted Christ when I was 3 years old, in the bathtub (yay baptism!). My mother led me through the prayer. I knew Jesus loved me, and that I wanted to go to Heaven when I died. So, as I grew and was educated, I learned what God wanted me to do, and what He didn't want me to do. I had no clue about sin, or my own sinfulness. I was a great guy. I was always a loner, but adults loved me and I had a good reputation. I knew about God and Jesus, and all other head knowledge, and I thought it would be credited to me for righteousness. In 7th grade, my mentor asked me to be his manager for the Boys and Girls Basketball teams. I was happy. It help me be more social and involved. I did that through 8th grade as well. I still was a loner, but I had more status. When I got to public high school, I realized not everyone believed the way I did. However, I still went to church and my youth group (Powerplay) so I stayed on the correct path. "I don't drink, smoke, chew or date girls who do." defined me pretty well. As life went on around me, I was safe inside my bubble. I became more social in high school and I wasn't "popular" in the sense that I was at parties every weekend and everyone tried to sit with me at lunch, but I was extremely well-known. I was liked by every clique while belonging to none in particular. From 9th-12th grade I was the Football manager and the Baseball manager. As a Freshman, the Senior athletes took me under their wing and I gained status. At Honors Night at the end of the year, I received an Academic Letter for straight A's (I also had a Varsity Football and a Varsity Baseball letter). Everyone was instructed to wait until everyone had been called before they clapped and I was the first name called in the second set of names. As I walked across the stage, the Seniors gave me a standing ovation. It was an honor. I already mentioned GHP 2003 in my first post, and that was a great honor as well. God really did bless me, and I began to own my faith.
Toward the end of my high school career Community Bible Church decided it was a good idea to fire my youth pastor. I, and most of the youth, left the church with him. I took it personally, and since I was going to college anyway it was a perfect excuse to just drop the church. I lost faith in the institution of church altogether. I stepped onto the University of Georgia campus in 2004 and joined the Football team as a manager. I knew I had to determine if I truly believed what I believed. I had left the church and my parents, so I had nobody to keep me accountable spiritually. I was still in a sort of works-based mindset, but not totally. I knew I had to make my faith my own, or leave it altogether. Now, most students quit religion when they get to college. My friend wrote an article in the "Red and Black" that summer and mentioned that "Sunday was the day Stuart Kingsley used to cleanse his soul...now he cleanses his clothes." I had become part of the statistic that quit church when they got to college. I did not quit on God, however. All through my 5 years of college, I did not go to a church building. My only spiritual input was Team United (FCA + AIA + GAO) at UGA, and that was only once a week. I had no real fellowship or accountability, largely by my own choosing. I got jaded around other believers. I didn't take them seriously. I had been wounded by my home church, and the people in it. "Christians" had treated me like crap growing up. Nobody really cared about me, so why should I care about them. I was going to make Christ mine and follow Him on my own. I set myself up for failure. Now, during my 5 years I spent a lot of time in the world, and I heard their objections to religion, God, etc. and I was able to seek the answers out. Because of that, I'm a lot more experienced, and I'm able to answer a lot of questions that unbelievers ask. I'll post my thoughts on those later.
In 2006, I turned 21 and I started my Junior year at UGA. I started running from God. I had put my trust in Him, and He lived in me, and He pulled me back from the edge even though I was running at it full tilt. At the beginning of 2007 my prayer to Him was "use me or kill me because I've reached the end of myself." Blessedly, He chose to use me. In 2000-2002 I had attended FCA Camp at St. Simons Island, and I felt God calling me back there to be a Huddle Leader. I knew I totally wasn't worthy to lead, but I felt God telling me to go. I ended up going to the Middle School Leadership Camp in Shocco Springs, AL, but that was after a week with my old youth pastor at Myrtle Beach. When I started the Myrtle Beach camp, I was still dark and rough, but over the course of the week God brought me back around. God capped off His redemption with a week of FCA Camp. So, at the start of my 4th year of college I was back in the spiritual game. I was back in the fight and fighting for the right team. 2007 turned out to be a great year, and gave me great momentum going into 2008.
I consider 2008 to be my favorite year this past decade. I bridged my 4th and 5th years at UGA with a Maymester and 2 Junemester classes. I had a confidence and swagger I cannot describe. I have no idea to this day where the swag came from, I just had it. But, God destroyed me at the end of the year. I don't really want to re-hash the details. At the end of 2008 everything I had built my life around was gone...except God.
At the beginning of 2009 I didn't want to be alive. I did my Practicum in the UGA Ticket Office and that was it. I just floated. God was all I had left to hold on to, so I began following Him. I knew I could no longer forsake the fellowship, and God led me to Athens Church. That was a huge blessing because it got me back into corporate worship. In May 2009 my good friend got married to an amazing girl, and their wedding was a pure testament to God's holiness. Normally, I hate weddings, but this one really lifted me up and encouraged me. In June 2009 I went to FCA Camp in Shocco Springs again and I was a counselor at Camp Icthus the following week. Through those 2 weeks of camps God built me up stronger than I ever knew I could be. He became real, my sinful nature became real, for the first time in my life I felt saved from something. I truly felt like a Christian not because I went to church, knew the Bible, or sang the songs but because I was dead and He brought me to life! I had no rhyme, reason or purpose to live into 2009, but He had a plan. I came back to Athens after the summer completely sold out and fearless. Not because I was some spiritual superhero, but because the Spirit was alive in me. In August 2009 I started attending a group at Watkinsville First Baptist Church called Fight Club. I will write more about Fight Club later, but God used it to literally save my life. At the end of 2009 I was a leader at Fontana camp with my old youth pastor, and on New Years Eve I looked back on how far God had brought me in 2009 and fell on the floor weeping.
Through 2010 God grew me even more. In the summer I worked 4 camps, 3 of which in back to back weeks. (Daytona with my old youth pastor, Icthus/Rock Haven in Arkansas/Icthus). The Spirit in me was firing on all cylinders. I grew in my awareness of my own depravity as well as my awareness of God's holiness. In that growing awareness I became more aware of the Gospel's importance in my life. In Fight Club we did the Gospel-Centered Life study. I highly recommend it! I started attending Watkinsville First Baptist Church full time in August 2010. The youth pastor asked college students to volunteer to lead middle schoolers and high schoolers for that school year, so I volunteered for middle school. I had 2 weeks of FCA Middle School Leadership Camp experience, and God has really given me a heart for Middle Schoolers. I became the small group leader for the 7th grade boys, and this past year was a blast. I'm sad it's over :(
Now it's 2011, and I'm anxious to see what else God has in store for me. Many other things happened to me along my road to today, but this is just an overview. If you read this and have any questions, my e-mail address is: stuartlkingsley@gmail.com just reference this blog in the subject line. I do not write this blog to glorify UGA Football even though I have many stories. I do not write this blog to get a girl. "I don't do this for money, I don't do this for fame, I don't do this so the industry can know my name..." - Lecrae! I write these things so that you may believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God. I was dead in sin, but His death brought me to life, and now I am alive. It's all about Him. Whatever He chooses to do with me is to His glory.
Sorry it was so long-winded, but thank you for reading!
-Stuart
Okay, for those of you who read your Bibles, that first paragraph was just a string of verses: Romans 7:24, 1 Corinthians 2:2, 1 Corinthians 2:5, 1 Corinthians 1:17, 1 Corinthians 1:18, 1 Corinthians 1:27, 1 Corinthians 9:19, and the last sentence refers to Jeremiah 9:23-24. I think it fits my testimony quite well now. I wrote an introductory post, but I thought I'd give you my testimony so that you will know where I'm coming from as I continue to write on this blog.
I was born August 23, 1985 to two Christian parents. I was raised in a Christian home. I attended Community Bible Church. I attended Kindergarten through 8th grade at Community Christian Academy. I was a Bible whiz kid. I accepted Christ when I was 3 years old, in the bathtub (yay baptism!). My mother led me through the prayer. I knew Jesus loved me, and that I wanted to go to Heaven when I died. So, as I grew and was educated, I learned what God wanted me to do, and what He didn't want me to do. I had no clue about sin, or my own sinfulness. I was a great guy. I was always a loner, but adults loved me and I had a good reputation. I knew about God and Jesus, and all other head knowledge, and I thought it would be credited to me for righteousness. In 7th grade, my mentor asked me to be his manager for the Boys and Girls Basketball teams. I was happy. It help me be more social and involved. I did that through 8th grade as well. I still was a loner, but I had more status. When I got to public high school, I realized not everyone believed the way I did. However, I still went to church and my youth group (Powerplay) so I stayed on the correct path. "I don't drink, smoke, chew or date girls who do." defined me pretty well. As life went on around me, I was safe inside my bubble. I became more social in high school and I wasn't "popular" in the sense that I was at parties every weekend and everyone tried to sit with me at lunch, but I was extremely well-known. I was liked by every clique while belonging to none in particular. From 9th-12th grade I was the Football manager and the Baseball manager. As a Freshman, the Senior athletes took me under their wing and I gained status. At Honors Night at the end of the year, I received an Academic Letter for straight A's (I also had a Varsity Football and a Varsity Baseball letter). Everyone was instructed to wait until everyone had been called before they clapped and I was the first name called in the second set of names. As I walked across the stage, the Seniors gave me a standing ovation. It was an honor. I already mentioned GHP 2003 in my first post, and that was a great honor as well. God really did bless me, and I began to own my faith.
Toward the end of my high school career Community Bible Church decided it was a good idea to fire my youth pastor. I, and most of the youth, left the church with him. I took it personally, and since I was going to college anyway it was a perfect excuse to just drop the church. I lost faith in the institution of church altogether. I stepped onto the University of Georgia campus in 2004 and joined the Football team as a manager. I knew I had to determine if I truly believed what I believed. I had left the church and my parents, so I had nobody to keep me accountable spiritually. I was still in a sort of works-based mindset, but not totally. I knew I had to make my faith my own, or leave it altogether. Now, most students quit religion when they get to college. My friend wrote an article in the "Red and Black" that summer and mentioned that "Sunday was the day Stuart Kingsley used to cleanse his soul...now he cleanses his clothes." I had become part of the statistic that quit church when they got to college. I did not quit on God, however. All through my 5 years of college, I did not go to a church building. My only spiritual input was Team United (FCA + AIA + GAO) at UGA, and that was only once a week. I had no real fellowship or accountability, largely by my own choosing. I got jaded around other believers. I didn't take them seriously. I had been wounded by my home church, and the people in it. "Christians" had treated me like crap growing up. Nobody really cared about me, so why should I care about them. I was going to make Christ mine and follow Him on my own. I set myself up for failure. Now, during my 5 years I spent a lot of time in the world, and I heard their objections to religion, God, etc. and I was able to seek the answers out. Because of that, I'm a lot more experienced, and I'm able to answer a lot of questions that unbelievers ask. I'll post my thoughts on those later.
In 2006, I turned 21 and I started my Junior year at UGA. I started running from God. I had put my trust in Him, and He lived in me, and He pulled me back from the edge even though I was running at it full tilt. At the beginning of 2007 my prayer to Him was "use me or kill me because I've reached the end of myself." Blessedly, He chose to use me. In 2000-2002 I had attended FCA Camp at St. Simons Island, and I felt God calling me back there to be a Huddle Leader. I knew I totally wasn't worthy to lead, but I felt God telling me to go. I ended up going to the Middle School Leadership Camp in Shocco Springs, AL, but that was after a week with my old youth pastor at Myrtle Beach. When I started the Myrtle Beach camp, I was still dark and rough, but over the course of the week God brought me back around. God capped off His redemption with a week of FCA Camp. So, at the start of my 4th year of college I was back in the spiritual game. I was back in the fight and fighting for the right team. 2007 turned out to be a great year, and gave me great momentum going into 2008.
I consider 2008 to be my favorite year this past decade. I bridged my 4th and 5th years at UGA with a Maymester and 2 Junemester classes. I had a confidence and swagger I cannot describe. I have no idea to this day where the swag came from, I just had it. But, God destroyed me at the end of the year. I don't really want to re-hash the details. At the end of 2008 everything I had built my life around was gone...except God.
At the beginning of 2009 I didn't want to be alive. I did my Practicum in the UGA Ticket Office and that was it. I just floated. God was all I had left to hold on to, so I began following Him. I knew I could no longer forsake the fellowship, and God led me to Athens Church. That was a huge blessing because it got me back into corporate worship. In May 2009 my good friend got married to an amazing girl, and their wedding was a pure testament to God's holiness. Normally, I hate weddings, but this one really lifted me up and encouraged me. In June 2009 I went to FCA Camp in Shocco Springs again and I was a counselor at Camp Icthus the following week. Through those 2 weeks of camps God built me up stronger than I ever knew I could be. He became real, my sinful nature became real, for the first time in my life I felt saved from something. I truly felt like a Christian not because I went to church, knew the Bible, or sang the songs but because I was dead and He brought me to life! I had no rhyme, reason or purpose to live into 2009, but He had a plan. I came back to Athens after the summer completely sold out and fearless. Not because I was some spiritual superhero, but because the Spirit was alive in me. In August 2009 I started attending a group at Watkinsville First Baptist Church called Fight Club. I will write more about Fight Club later, but God used it to literally save my life. At the end of 2009 I was a leader at Fontana camp with my old youth pastor, and on New Years Eve I looked back on how far God had brought me in 2009 and fell on the floor weeping.
Through 2010 God grew me even more. In the summer I worked 4 camps, 3 of which in back to back weeks. (Daytona with my old youth pastor, Icthus/Rock Haven in Arkansas/Icthus). The Spirit in me was firing on all cylinders. I grew in my awareness of my own depravity as well as my awareness of God's holiness. In that growing awareness I became more aware of the Gospel's importance in my life. In Fight Club we did the Gospel-Centered Life study. I highly recommend it! I started attending Watkinsville First Baptist Church full time in August 2010. The youth pastor asked college students to volunteer to lead middle schoolers and high schoolers for that school year, so I volunteered for middle school. I had 2 weeks of FCA Middle School Leadership Camp experience, and God has really given me a heart for Middle Schoolers. I became the small group leader for the 7th grade boys, and this past year was a blast. I'm sad it's over :(
Now it's 2011, and I'm anxious to see what else God has in store for me. Many other things happened to me along my road to today, but this is just an overview. If you read this and have any questions, my e-mail address is: stuartlkingsley@gmail.com just reference this blog in the subject line. I do not write this blog to glorify UGA Football even though I have many stories. I do not write this blog to get a girl. "I don't do this for money, I don't do this for fame, I don't do this so the industry can know my name..." - Lecrae! I write these things so that you may believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God. I was dead in sin, but His death brought me to life, and now I am alive. It's all about Him. Whatever He chooses to do with me is to His glory.
Sorry it was so long-winded, but thank you for reading!
-Stuart
Friday, May 20, 2011
Friday, May 20, 2011
God doesn't give me more than I can handle. He wants me to run to Him. Whatever trials He puts in front of me drive me closer to Him. Steven Curtis Chapman's song "Bring It On" comes to mind. God has the ability to remove people from my life so that I will focus on Him. I find that sadistic (LoL). I'd be the villain if I removed people from someone's life so they would focus on me. God is God though, and He truly knows what is best. So, why is He showing me what I so desperately want? There is no step-by-step solution to obtaining anything from Him. I'd like to believe I could accomplish a checklist, but that checklist is The Law, and I failed...epically. God reveals so many double standards in my life. By seeking an earthly relationship I tell Him that my relationship with Him is not sufficient. I am a whore. If you don't believe that you're a whore too, read the book of Hosea. God loves us, and is sufficient, but we constantly stray and give ourselves to something or someone else. God is not just sufficient, He is abundant! I should not be content to just get by comfortably. I want more of Him. As I read His Word, I want more. Matthew 6:33 tells me that I should seek Him first before I get all of these good blessings. I should NOT seek Him SO THAT I can get blessings. If I'm seeking Him fully then everything else becomes a "nice-to-have", but is still expendable compared to knowing Him. Nothing else will satisfy me. Money, a wife, a nice house, car, et al. will not satisfy me. I want that abandon. I want to lose myself in Him. I want to face 300 enemies and have fire from Heaven consume them. I want to kill 1000 enemies with my stick (hah!) I want to fiercely and passionately love my wife because God is flowing through me. I can see it. I can feel it. I have tasted it. I want it. I want to be so full of the Spirit that it destroys me utterly. Like Rand al'Thor (In the Wheel of Time series) filling himself with the One Power to the point of near destruction. I want the light in me to kill the darkness. I cannot defeat sin on my own. Only He can. Only He did. I only need Him. I went back and re-read Romans 6. Romans 6:21 applies to me in very personal ways: "But what fruit were you getting at that time from the things of which you are now ashamed? For the end of those is death." I love when Scripture applies to me even if it's a swift kick in the pants. The fruit I bear now, however, leads to sanctification (Romans 6:22). I strive to bear the right fruit now even though it's a slow process.
Well, I've caught up on my journal so far. I wish I could go into more detail about just how personal all of this is to me, but I think you get the picture without my going into so much detail. I have lived almost 26 years on this earth, and I have had so many experiences. As Scripture brings them to light, I hope to share them with you so that you may be encouraged as well. Until next time, friends.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Well, I've caught up on my journal so far. I wish I could go into more detail about just how personal all of this is to me, but I think you get the picture without my going into so much detail. I have lived almost 26 years on this earth, and I have had so many experiences. As Scripture brings them to light, I hope to share them with you so that you may be encouraged as well. Until next time, friends.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Thursday, May 19, 2011
The parts of church that I loved are over. College friends have graduated or are gone for the summer. I start Maymester tomorrow, but interaction will be limited by a small class size (I have 4 classmates). I am again at a point where I feel the best times are behind me. I am a fool. God has come through every time in a big way. I know He will blow me away. God is the Author, and any story that I could write is nothing compared to the story He is writing for me. I always want to take the pen away from Him because I think I have a feel for where the story is going and I think I can write it better. That'd be like me telling J.K. Rowling that I could write Harry Potter or George R.R. Martin that I could write The Song of Ice and Fire. It's all madness. God is giddy with excitement at each turn of my page. Each chapter yields something new and awesome. I say 2008 was the best year for me. True. I was most happy then, but at the end God leveled me. He destroyed everything I tried to build on His foundation. He burned every page I tried to write. Look at 2009. FCA Camp and Camp Icthus. God rocked me to my core and set my feet on a rock. The Rock. At the end of 2009 at camp in Fontana, NC, I wept because of His redemption. Look at 2010. He let me grow in Fight Club. He provided for grad school so I could stay in Athens. I did Daytona, Rock Haven in Arkansas, and 2 weeks of Camp Icthus. Three weeks in a row: Icthus/Rock Haven/Icthus. He told me to jump into WFBC and the Underground. I grew exponentially. Fontana, Valentine's Day w/ the WFBC crew, the College Retreat, etc. began 2011. Now all that is over, but there is still room to grow. I only have 2 camps planned this summer (both Icthus). I know I will look back on 2011 on New Year's Eve and fall to my knees again. This is my "breather" right now. I just need to focus on Him. I am definitely in a "now what?" phase even though I have my plans laid out for the rest of this year. God promises good to me. I challenge Him to show Himself. I encourage Him to show off. I dare Him to use me. I love Him. That's why I started writing my journal (transcribed partially into this blog), to record how awesome He is. No matter how sad or depressed I feel, I set my eyes on Him and feel better. Philippians 1:6 says He will complete the good work He started in me. Habakkuk 1:5 says I wouldn't believe it if He told me what it is. Romans 8 tells me I am more than a conqueror. Nothing can separate me from His love. All things work together for my good. In my mind and heart I have desires, but here in my "breather" there is only Him.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Habakkuk
Okay, jumping right in then :)
I had a really rough week this week. There are a lot of personal details involved that would take several posts to explain, but let me just sum it up by saying that I want something badly, God keeps it out of reach, and I don't like it. Given that, I have learned a lot. (Pause to grab my Bible and journal).
I read Habakkuk. Fun to spell! It's only 3 chapters consisting of a conversation between God and Habakkuk. God tells Habakkuk that He will punish the Israelites with the Chaldeans (Babylonians), and Habakkuk asks why He would use His enemies against His chosen people. Bottom line: evil has to be punished. God tells Habakkuk that He will punish Babylon after He makes His point with the Israelites. Remember, the Babylonian invasion led to the story of Daniel, Shadrach, Meschach and Abednego, so God knew what He was doing. In Habakkuk 1:5 God says, "Look among the nations and see; wonder and be astounded. For I am doing a work in your days that you would not believe if told." I like that and hate that at the same time. I like it because God is capable of doing unbelievable things. Good or Bad. Rutger Hauer's character in the movie Blade Runner said, "I have seen things you people wouldn't believe". I like that quote. I hope to one day be able to honestly say that. Hopefully in a good way though. I hate 1:5 because it's not all about me. I can't focus on myself. I have to lift my eyes up and see what God is doing. He promises I won't believe what I see. Again, I hope it is good. So, how can I apply this to myself? God is amazing in this. If I focus on myself, I feel bad and upset. I can't control my life, so I get frustrated. God tells me to lift my eyes up. In Habakkuk 2:2 He says to write the vision down plainly, so I'm doing my best. In this context, He is assuring an impending punishment for His people at the hands of the Babylonians. He also assures that He will build His people back afterward greater than they were before. I haven't had a vision or a distinct prophecy, but this could apply to His plan for my life (and yours). In Habakkuk 2:3 God says, "For still the vision awaits its appointed time; it hastens to the end-it will not delay." This comforts me. It's also funny. God says the vision, or prophecy, will come true at an appointed time, but also that it hurries. God truly does laugh at our timetable. He tells us to wait if it seems slow because it is coming. It is unavoidable, imminent. It will get here soon enough, and w/o delay. He's telling me to wait on Him because "the righteous shall live by faith" (Habakkuk 2:4). I have faith that God will leave me speechless. He has promised good to me (Jeremiah 29:11; Romans 8:28, to name a few) so I am not worried. Enemies may overtake me, but I will awe in their defeat soon after. Whatever happens to me, I wouldn't believe it right now if He told me (Habakkuk 1:5).
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
I had a really rough week this week. There are a lot of personal details involved that would take several posts to explain, but let me just sum it up by saying that I want something badly, God keeps it out of reach, and I don't like it. Given that, I have learned a lot. (Pause to grab my Bible and journal).
I read Habakkuk. Fun to spell! It's only 3 chapters consisting of a conversation between God and Habakkuk. God tells Habakkuk that He will punish the Israelites with the Chaldeans (Babylonians), and Habakkuk asks why He would use His enemies against His chosen people. Bottom line: evil has to be punished. God tells Habakkuk that He will punish Babylon after He makes His point with the Israelites. Remember, the Babylonian invasion led to the story of Daniel, Shadrach, Meschach and Abednego, so God knew what He was doing. In Habakkuk 1:5 God says, "Look among the nations and see; wonder and be astounded. For I am doing a work in your days that you would not believe if told." I like that and hate that at the same time. I like it because God is capable of doing unbelievable things. Good or Bad. Rutger Hauer's character in the movie Blade Runner said, "I have seen things you people wouldn't believe". I like that quote. I hope to one day be able to honestly say that. Hopefully in a good way though. I hate 1:5 because it's not all about me. I can't focus on myself. I have to lift my eyes up and see what God is doing. He promises I won't believe what I see. Again, I hope it is good. So, how can I apply this to myself? God is amazing in this. If I focus on myself, I feel bad and upset. I can't control my life, so I get frustrated. God tells me to lift my eyes up. In Habakkuk 2:2 He says to write the vision down plainly, so I'm doing my best. In this context, He is assuring an impending punishment for His people at the hands of the Babylonians. He also assures that He will build His people back afterward greater than they were before. I haven't had a vision or a distinct prophecy, but this could apply to His plan for my life (and yours). In Habakkuk 2:3 God says, "For still the vision awaits its appointed time; it hastens to the end-it will not delay." This comforts me. It's also funny. God says the vision, or prophecy, will come true at an appointed time, but also that it hurries. God truly does laugh at our timetable. He tells us to wait if it seems slow because it is coming. It is unavoidable, imminent. It will get here soon enough, and w/o delay. He's telling me to wait on Him because "the righteous shall live by faith" (Habakkuk 2:4). I have faith that God will leave me speechless. He has promised good to me (Jeremiah 29:11; Romans 8:28, to name a few) so I am not worried. Enemies may overtake me, but I will awe in their defeat soon after. Whatever happens to me, I wouldn't believe it right now if He told me (Habakkuk 1:5).
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
Welcome
Hello, all, and thank you for taking the time to visit my blog. My name is Stuart Kingsley, and currently I am a graduate student at the University of Georgia.
In 2003, I felt God telling me to write a book that would be called Sticks and Stones. In my mind, I felt I hadn't experienced enough to write a book, so I kept the idea locked away in my mind. I know blogs are a dime a dozen these days, but I felt that since I haven't begun writing Sticks and Stones in novel form I could at least start composing my thoughts in a manner I could share with others. I keep a journal, and God has really been moving through His Word, so I hope that most of this blog will be rooted in Scripture.
That being said, allow me to explain the story behind Sticks and Stones. When I was a Sophomore in high school, I read Frank E. Peretti's book This Present Darkness. It literally changed my spiritual walk. It changed my prayer life drastically, and it opened my eyes to the importance of spiritual warfare. Now, when I say spiritual warfare I do not mean just God vs. Satan or Angels vs. Demons. Spiritual warfare is really a war against our own sinful natures. Our battle is against our flesh, and we fight for a closer walk with Christ to become more like Him. I will definitely speak more to this in later posts. In 2003, I attended the Georgia Governors Honors Program with 675 other qualified Georgia high school students. At that time in my life I was coming out of a dark period where I had been running from God. A friend of mine started a Bible study at GHP, and asked if I would come to it. At first, I thought it was just an attempt for her to show off how much more holy she was than the rest of us, and I told her, "I am not being attacked right now, so I think I'm good." She rebuked me, and I needed it. I realized that if Satan was not making an effort to take me out of the game, then I wasn't doing my job. I now refer to those 6 weeks as "The Battle of GHP" because I was literally under attack from Satan every day as I witnessed to someone who eventually accepted Christ. So, it was a victory for God's team. I had never felt more alive even though I was kept awake at night by shadows moving in my room, and I was also sick every day. God gave me a purpose that summer, and the 8 years that have followed have been an incredible ride. More details should come out in later posts, but this is just an introduction.
So, why "Sticks and Stones" for a title? Those of you who know me know that I carry around a stick. I bought a $2 broomstick at Home Depot my Sophomore year of high school after reading This Present Darkness, and wrapped it in black athletic tape. It now symbolizes spiritual warfare for me. (I can't carry around a real sword. It is frowned upon.) "Stick" comes from Psalm 23, which talks about how God is the Good Shepherd, and that His rod and staff comfort us. Also, Moses and Aaron rocked the world with some sticks. (Exodus 4:1-5, for one) Most importantly, however, Christ was crucified on a big stick. Because of His sacrifice on that Cross, I am able to write this blog. I am able to live and breathe even though I deserve death. Don't get it twisted, the stick is not an idol. It is a ministry tool, and so far it has been used to start a lot of spiritual conversations. When God is done using it, He can burn it, break it, whatever. "Stone" comes mainly from Psalm 118:22, "The stone the builders rejected has become the cornerstone". That verse is referenced a lot in the New Testament and speaks about Jesus the Messiah. His own people rejected Him, and now He is the cornerstone of our faith and our only hope for salvation. Also, they put Him in a tomb and thought a big stone could contain Him. You can also say that David killed Goliath with a stone. My point is that sticks and stones are all throughout the Bible, and all point back to the Creator.
So, as I read Scripture and learn, I hope to share what I learn with you that God may work in you as well. I do not claim to be an orator, or a master of words. I cannot promise you a Pulitzer or #1 NY Times Bestseller, but I can promise you that I will be open, transparent and honest so that even in my weakness the name of Jesus Christ, our risen Messiah, will be lifted high.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
In 2003, I felt God telling me to write a book that would be called Sticks and Stones. In my mind, I felt I hadn't experienced enough to write a book, so I kept the idea locked away in my mind. I know blogs are a dime a dozen these days, but I felt that since I haven't begun writing Sticks and Stones in novel form I could at least start composing my thoughts in a manner I could share with others. I keep a journal, and God has really been moving through His Word, so I hope that most of this blog will be rooted in Scripture.
That being said, allow me to explain the story behind Sticks and Stones. When I was a Sophomore in high school, I read Frank E. Peretti's book This Present Darkness. It literally changed my spiritual walk. It changed my prayer life drastically, and it opened my eyes to the importance of spiritual warfare. Now, when I say spiritual warfare I do not mean just God vs. Satan or Angels vs. Demons. Spiritual warfare is really a war against our own sinful natures. Our battle is against our flesh, and we fight for a closer walk with Christ to become more like Him. I will definitely speak more to this in later posts. In 2003, I attended the Georgia Governors Honors Program with 675 other qualified Georgia high school students. At that time in my life I was coming out of a dark period where I had been running from God. A friend of mine started a Bible study at GHP, and asked if I would come to it. At first, I thought it was just an attempt for her to show off how much more holy she was than the rest of us, and I told her, "I am not being attacked right now, so I think I'm good." She rebuked me, and I needed it. I realized that if Satan was not making an effort to take me out of the game, then I wasn't doing my job. I now refer to those 6 weeks as "The Battle of GHP" because I was literally under attack from Satan every day as I witnessed to someone who eventually accepted Christ. So, it was a victory for God's team. I had never felt more alive even though I was kept awake at night by shadows moving in my room, and I was also sick every day. God gave me a purpose that summer, and the 8 years that have followed have been an incredible ride. More details should come out in later posts, but this is just an introduction.
So, why "Sticks and Stones" for a title? Those of you who know me know that I carry around a stick. I bought a $2 broomstick at Home Depot my Sophomore year of high school after reading This Present Darkness, and wrapped it in black athletic tape. It now symbolizes spiritual warfare for me. (I can't carry around a real sword. It is frowned upon.) "Stick" comes from Psalm 23, which talks about how God is the Good Shepherd, and that His rod and staff comfort us. Also, Moses and Aaron rocked the world with some sticks. (Exodus 4:1-5, for one) Most importantly, however, Christ was crucified on a big stick. Because of His sacrifice on that Cross, I am able to write this blog. I am able to live and breathe even though I deserve death. Don't get it twisted, the stick is not an idol. It is a ministry tool, and so far it has been used to start a lot of spiritual conversations. When God is done using it, He can burn it, break it, whatever. "Stone" comes mainly from Psalm 118:22, "The stone the builders rejected has become the cornerstone". That verse is referenced a lot in the New Testament and speaks about Jesus the Messiah. His own people rejected Him, and now He is the cornerstone of our faith and our only hope for salvation. Also, they put Him in a tomb and thought a big stone could contain Him. You can also say that David killed Goliath with a stone. My point is that sticks and stones are all throughout the Bible, and all point back to the Creator.
So, as I read Scripture and learn, I hope to share what I learn with you that God may work in you as well. I do not claim to be an orator, or a master of words. I cannot promise you a Pulitzer or #1 NY Times Bestseller, but I can promise you that I will be open, transparent and honest so that even in my weakness the name of Jesus Christ, our risen Messiah, will be lifted high.
For the Kingdom,
Stuart
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